Reflecting Back
Lessons to repeat and remember
We are in the last month of this year. I have been reflecting on my year in my mind from last few days. So this morning, I picked my pen and diary to write it down. To be honest, it has been one of the challenging years but also one of the most important years in my healing journey. I met the parts of me I have been betraying from years. I cried, laughed, grieved, danced, wrote poems, listened, loved and let go a lot of things this year. It has been painful yet beautiful year of my life. Below are few of the things that I learned this year (in no sequence):
This year, I started my journey of learning to hold my own hand, in the times when there was no one to lean on to.
I started my journey of understanding the complexity of being human. In every situation, noticing a little girl inside me who is trying hard to make sense of everything happening.
I realized the importance of giving space to myself, others and my problems. 90 percent of the things I worry about are not the things I need to resolve immediately. Even for the things I need to find solutions immediately, they don’t solve when I panic. I usually end up finding the solutions when I am grounded and regulated.
The world looks like a beautiful place when I have slept and ate enough.
Whenever I feel any uncomfortable emotion like being anxious, unsafe or overwhelmed, taking few long breaths help. Also, saying affirmations like I love you, you are safe, you are protected, and we will figure this out to myself helps.
I am learning to stand up for myself. To act from the place of I matter, my needs, my feelings, my emotions, my sleep, my naps, my passion, my hunger, my thirst, my dreams everything matters.
The world is responding to your self-worth. You will end up with things what you believe you are deserving of.
Use your time and energy as your most precious treasures. Just spend it on people, things or places that make you feel good.
Prayers are important. Ask for courage and wisdom in your prayers to help you to cross the tough times of your life.
Fear is real. Everyone in the world feels it. Don’t let fear to stop you from something you want to do. Do it with fear. Deal with it on the way.
Intention matters more than the task itself. You can do same thing with different intentions. The after feeling depends on the intention with which you did it.
Change is always uncomfortable and hard, but it doesn’t mean that it is not right for you. It takes some time to get use to the new reality.
Saying no will take you faster to the things that are meant for you.
Learning to listen to your intuition is an art in itself. Keep practicing it, until it becomes your second nature.
Your emotional baggage is your responsibility to unpack. Your loved ones can hold your hand while you gather the courage to unpack.
Understand your subconscious mind. Otherwise it will keep ruling your world, without you knowing it.
Feelings that sound like opposites can coexists. You can be happy and overwhelmed. You can be grateful and grieving. You can be scared and excited. You can be proud and anxious. You can be secure and need your people.
Allow yourself to make mistakes in all areas of life. You will mess up things, hurt people, overreact and underreact in certain situations. Forgive yourself and do better next time.
Accountability is a courageous act. Don’t expect it from everyone.
We all are looking at the world through a lens. That lens is formed by our past experiences. It has layers of our emotional wounds, insecurities, fears, traumas and ego.
You have to make effort to improve your relationship with yourself. Same level or more of the effort you put in for any other relationship.
Denial of your feelings can be more painful than the actual pain. Feel your pain and it shall pass.
Hold your relationships loosely. Let people enter and leave with ease.
You can’t make people see your worth. Leave the table where you feel underfed. You can’t nurture anything when you are feeling hungry.
Don’t beg for love. It is the most painful way of betraying yourself.
Any kind of failure teaches you a lot more than success. Embrace your failures.
Vulnerability and sensitivity are superpowers in today’s world.
Doing things for yourself will make you experience pure joy and bliss.
I hope this year was good to you. I hope you had the experiences which made you come closer to yourself. I hope you had moments which filled your heart with love and ecstasy. I am sorry if you felt pain, grieved or let go of things. I am proud of you in surviving everything you have been through this year.
Lots of love and healing,
Harneek!